Crosswalks to Nowhere

Like many homeowners, I'll usually have a radio nearby while working on a project like painting or (intentionally) knocking a hole in a wall. I use a cheapie RCA radio-cassette boombox that's been dropped, kicked, splattered with paint, and otherwise abused, yet it still keeps on ticking in its low-fi way.

There are times when I'm doing these projects and I truly can't find anything worth listening to on the radio dial. And short of digging out my cassette tapes (or recording new ones) or keeping my laptop nearby (and in harm's way of flying paint or drywall), there haven't been too many options.

Then I discovered the C Crane Digital FM Transmitter. This is a unit that plugs into the headphone-out jack of any device and retransmits the audio through any nearby radio that's tuned to the matching FM frequency. I've seen devices like these for use in the car, but this was one of the first standalone transmitters I've found that would be suitable for use around the house.

The transmitter is simple to use: just put in two AA batteries (or use the included AC adapter), plug the attached coiled cable into your iPod or computer, select a frequency, adjust the audio level, and tune the radio to hear your broadcast. I had the unit operating within minutes of taking it out of the package.

Audio quality is pretty good. I've used the unit while it's plugged into my iPod and the computer, and it does a nice job. When listening on my "project" boombox the sound is more than acceptable, and it's even respectable when I tune in through one of my Tivoli radios or the old Grundig 1099. The unit broadcasts in stereo when connected to a stereo audio source.

The range of the transmitter is somewhat lacking; I had to do a lot of re-orienting of the base and antenna unit to get a good signal in certain areas of the house, which was a pain. That said, there are instructions on the internet that describe how to modify the unit to increase its transmission range. I don't advocate this as it will void your warranty, but there are some impressive success stories posted out there.

Now I can listen to Kermode and Mayo anywhere in the house. Some might find that annoying, I think it's pretty entertaining.

I bought the transmitter at Amazon for around $70. Not a bad price for the convenience it brings!

(This article also appears on my radio site, www.joesradiopage.com.)

I've recently become a source of amusement to my lovely wife. I suppose in some ways I've always amused her, but lately she's been cracking up over my reaction to a series of TV commercials.

We keep running across half-hour infomercials for those Time-Life music collections: you know them-- a has-been musical celebrity like Tony Orlando talks to a host with a fakey name like "Chelsea Applestone" about a collection of CDs containing 168 Awesome Soft Rock Hits! or 138 Romantic Classics!

The infomercial splits its time between the hosts' reading cue cards, comments by more fakey-named people talking to someone off-camera about how super it is to have all these songs in one place, and of course, clips of all the fabulous songs on the collection.

About a minute into the commercial I usually start wondering aloud if the guys from Air Supply actually live in a place that looks identical to the set they're sitting in or if Huey Lewis was hitting on Valerie Springbutton between takes of the "Superstars of the 80s" spot.

And then there's the music, but I don't really need to explain my opinions on "She Believes in Me" or "Ride Like the Wind," do I?

(One exception: when they play the clip of Linda Ronstadt singing "Blue Bayou" the room falls silent. Some things from the 1970s are above reproach, thank you very much.)

All that said, here's my take on these collections: you don't have to actually buy the CD sets, you can simply watch the commercials. Why? Because nobody really needs to hear all these songs in their complete form. A memory is like the flash of a camera-- it comes quickly, you're in the moment, and then it's gone. The absolute perfection of these commercials is the fact that in 30 minutes you can be taken back to a period in your life when these songs meant something to you, and then it's back to the remote and The Colbert Report.

Case in point: during one of these commercials, they played a clip of Boston's "More Than a Feeling;" the memory that flashed through my head had me driving in my 1974 SuperBeetle to my friend Craig's house on a bright Saturday morning in May during my senior year of high school. We hung out in his driveway and then went out for Italian Beef sandwiches. All of that was evoked from fewer than 5 seconds of a Boston song. Would I have recalled more if I heard the rest of the song? Probably not.

Do you really need to hear all of "We Are The Champions" to reminisce about 1978? I'll bet that the average listener would get about 45 seconds into the song and start reaching for the button to get to the next track. Think about it: "I've paid my duuuuuuuuesss..."

My advice: save the $150 and TiVo the commercials. The bonus is that nobody will ever hassle you for actually buying an "As Seen on TV" CD collection.

Meanwhile, Lisa continues to laugh while I play the grumpy old man who's cursing out the TV. I think she thinks it's cute that I'm getting old and cantankerous. Maybe I am.

This is one of my favorite times of year: the snow is melting, the days get warmer, there's a hint of freshness to the air... and Coca-Cola made with real sugar returns to the store shelves for a little while, anyway.

But I can't tell you how surprised I was when I walked into the Dominick's in Elk Grove Village last night to find a display featuring this neat new product: Pepsi Natural. According to this press release:

Pepsi Natural is made with all-natural ingredients, including lightly sparkling water, natural sugar, natural caramel and kola nut extract. The amber-hued cola gets its color from natural caramel and natural apple extract. From the amount of bubbles to the foam that rises to the top of beverage when it's poured, Pepsi Natural offers a brand-new cola experience.

This evening, I opened up a bottle and poured it into a glass, no ice. My verdict: it's pretty nice. It's not as sweet as regular Pepsi and comes off "cleaner" at the start. The kola flavor that usually gets buried inside regular PepsI's (and Coke's for that matter) formula is prominent at the end. I think it has a nice, subtle taste, not really comparable to Pepsi or Coke.

Will I buy it again? Possibly. Since it doesn't taste quite as sweet as regular Pepsi I have the feeling this will be a refreshing alternative on a hot summer day.

Pepsi Natural has 150 calories per 12 oz serving and 39g of carbs, just like a regular Pepsi.

Pepsi Natural is available in Chicago, Cleveland, Pittsburgh, Los Angeles, San Diego, San Francisco, Seattle, Portland, Las Vegas and New York. It's part of a campaign called "Refresh Everything" which includes another sugar-formulated Pepsi product called "Pepsi Throwback" and a companion "Mountain Dew Throwback," which evidently are based on their 60s and 70s heritage. Despite the unfortunate names, I'll be seeking out the "Throwback" products, which are supposed to be available only for eight weeks beginning April 20. I'll have a review here when I find them.

I've been saying for a long time that Coca-Cola should introduce a premium product made with the original original formula made with sugar (and no, not the recipe with cocaine). They should put it in those 8-oz glass bottles you see especially around Christmas time and charge a premium for the whole thing. They may not make kabillions, but they would certainly goose up the sales of their flagship product. I guess they just wanted to let Pepsi try it first, sort of-- Pepsi Throwback will come in a 12-oz can.

I hope someone at Coca-Cola headquarters is paying attention.

Two years ago today, I became the happiest person I know.

And I still feel the same way.

...'cause I said it was.

This is what our world looked like this past Sunday morning:

Bring it on, Spring!